News from the PD...sob story

DH had his final appointment with the Urologist (PD) this morning. It didn't go as well as planned and got the news I have been dreading. All his bloodwork came back normal. Why can't we just get some answers instead of "we don't know why you can't get pregnant or have low sperm"? He said we are done with the Urologist and it is time to move on to an RE (Reproductive Endocrinologist), they will need to do a testicle biopsy on him to determine why his count is so low. At the same time they recommend doing an IUI (intrauterine insemination) because they will get all of his best swimmers out at the time of the biopsy, let's not waste those. I think I need some wine and chocolate right now.

We won't be going until January since this cycle is half over already. I pray that like so many women we won't need to do any of this because I am actually pregnant and don't know it yet. Ha yeah right. I am feeling a little blue today. I can't believe that a whole nother year has past without a hint of conception. How did I ever think "first cycle I will be pregnant because I know my body so well"? What a load of crap. How could I be so naive. April will be our 2 year mark of trying to conceive, I really don't know if my heart can take reaching that milestone. This past year has really kicked the shit out of me and Jimmy. I hope that 2010 is our lucky year and we don't have to go another 365 days without being pregnant.